Decision-Making Part 1: Faking You Out Big Time!
A new series of blogs on how we make decisions
I read a newsletter article this week by Anne-Laure Le Cunff of Ness Labs. It was called “Why Smart People Make Dumb Decisions.”
Her article reminded me that I wanted to blog about decision-making, so here we are.
Decision-making is the process we use to identify, sort through, and select an option, produce a final choice, and maybe take action on it. For the most part, this is a rational process...at least it appears to be, and we like to believe it is.
The decisions we make in a day can range from what to eat for breakfast, should I click on this link or not, or what to invest our money in.
We Do It In a Nanosecond
We make thousands of these choices every day — most automatically — using mental models that integrate past experience, consequences, memory, values, beliefs, and desires so we know how to behave next. We don’t have the luxury of full seconds to decide which way to move when a ball is speeding our way, or how to respond when we see brake lights in front of us, so most of this happens in a nanosecond.
If you asked the average person, they’d tell you they make mindful, well-thought-out decisions. If you told them the left brain is rational and the right brain is emotional, and asked them which side of their brain makes decisions, the resounding chorus would be, “Left brain!”
And they’d be wrong.
Left Brain, Right Brain, Front Brain, Back Brain
The decision-making process is actually a front-to-back-of-the-brain process that relies dominantly on emotional centers. We like to think we use reason and logic (and data!) to arrive at a smart decision. That’s because we don’t notice the emotional, historical, and subversive memories operating in the netherregions of our brain.
Our bias towards our decisions being logical is further emphasized when we use words to justify them — words that come from the left region of the brain, where our verbal centers reside.
Wrong Again
A lot of research on decision-making has been done in the realm of dieting. But my interest has always been on why people choose certain things for their births... and why they don’t follow through or change their minds when the rubber hits the road.
One explanation is that labor is just harder than what they expected, what they could imagine, or what they’re prepared to navigate. The birth process really is outside any other life experience. It's like trying to plan how to jump a car across the Grand Canyon when you’ve never operated a vehicle before.
For decades, I watched childbirth educators and doulas make a fundamental mistake when it came to preparing people for labor and how to make decisions when they’re in it.
The most popular school of thought relies on the belief that if people have good information — current, evidence-based, rational data — they will make good decisions for their care in labor.
But that’s not how it works at all.
All the Emotional Players
Here’s what scientists have discovered about how we make decisions:
The hippocampus is involved in memory, learning, and emotion. Its main job is transferring short-term memories to long-term storage, but it also plays a role in emotional processing, including anxiety and avoidance behaviors.
The prefrontal cortex regulates our thoughts, actions, and emotions by connecting with other brain regions. The prefrontal cortex is in close contact with the structures and circuits of the emotional brain that seek gratification and alert us to danger. It also evaluates risks and rewards and applies them to the future.
The anterior cingulate cortex is involved in several complex cognitive functions, such as empathy, impulse control, and emotion.
The orbitofrontal cortex — primarily known for its role in identity and reward values for taste and smells — seems to determine the relative reward value of choice options as well, and provides biasing signals in more complex decision-making situations.
And then there’s the ventromedial prefrontal cortex (I know you were wondering when I’d bring it up!), which binds together the networks that support emotional processing, decision-making, memory, self-perception, and social cognition — all factors that influence our decisions.
You see, it’s not about data at all!
Why Don't We All Know This?
I used a completely different model of birth preparation, taught to me by Pam England from her book Birthing From Within, that focused on excavating one’s first beliefs about birth, exploring their current values, and guiding them through a process to initiate and prepare them for the journey of birth however it unfolds. Sure, we talked about facts and data, and I shared a decision-making model for labor, but now they had a heads up that their emotions were the real driver of decisions they’d be making.
“Because we have to make decisions every day — at work and in our personal lives — it’s surprising that smart decision-making is not taught in school. It’s the kind of skill everyone should have in their mental toolkit.” — Anne-Laure Le Cunff, Ness Labs
It sure would make navigating birth a lot easier.
(P.S. It’s also important to note that the frontal lobes of the brain don’t fully mature until after puberty. So kids and teens are literally unable to make good decisions. I know that’s not a surprise to any of the parents here. But it also stresses why decision-making skills should be taught in schools.)
Changing Our Tune
In last week’s vlog, I spoke about neuroplasticity and how our nervous system, brain, patterns, and beliefs — all the things that drive our thoughts and behaviors — are not rigid. So it goes without saying (but I’m going to say it anyway) that if we make decisions based on past experiences and observed consequences, but we change the meaning or value of those things via neuroplasticity, our decisions will change as well.
Which is why some folks start making very different choices after a period of transition, reflection, or personal development.
If you do end-of-the-year goal-setting, you might be interested in how the concepts of neuroplasticity and decision-making can be factored in.
The New Year goals that many people create are often a narrow-visioned prospect: pick the things you want to happen, write them down, and post them on the bathroom mirror. Maybe say a few mantras or self-affirmations to make them come true.
I take a different approach, and I love sharing it with folks. It’s a process of deep reflection, forward-visioning (to your funeral, to be specific...about as far forward as you can go in your own life's events), and using your decision-making style to set 1-, 5-, and 10-year goals. I use this process in my JumpStart program because it's also a great process for business owners.
Next week, I’ll talk about two models for decision-making, the factors that influence our decision-making style, and how our best-laid plans can get derailed via the “Oh, fuck it!” phenomenon. See you then.
I’m thinking about offering a goal-setting workshop using my 3-part approach around the new year. Let me know if you’re interested.
